Solutions to Human Problems

Recently when I was traveling with a Bus, I happened to hear an interesting conversation. The conversation was in native language and people were sharing jokes. The articulation of those jokes was wonderful and really hilarious. The situations and circumstances that guy was sharing were quite local but they had ethnic taste which may not be available anywhere else. Those dialogues were unheard, never recorded or documented ever and I am sure, will never get recorded/archived.

That time, I realized the value of the lost timeless moments. Sometimes I think the kind of childhood I (for that matter, my generation) enjoyed, may not be available to the current generation. Those small pleasures like making a paper boat and let it flow in the rainwater and running behind it wherever it goes, the pleasure of being half-naked and running around in the rain-water, sitting along with my mother in a chilled winter night in the kitchen besides “chullha” and blowing the air on fire with an iron pipe (“phoonkni”), sleeping on a “charpai” in a summer night on a village street and so on.

Some of it is lost and some will be lost in the coming time. Nobody will know those small pleasures ever. Similarly, ever wondered how people in India or for that matter anywhere in the world used to live before 500 years ago. What were their circumstances, living styles, problems, limitations and small pleasures they lived for. Nobody knows how the court of Akbar really looked like at that time. How he looked like, how he behaved, what about his Navratnas and things like that. We may cherish the celluloid version of Akbar’s life but in reality the situation and circumstances could be entirely different. Whatever is documented are praises for the invader or emperor. The real social scenario and behavioral aspects are lost somewhere which can never be tracked now. So you know what, many of those timeless aspects are lost forever.

The situation which I am going to discuss now happens to every individual at some point of life. But reaction varies from person to person. Here I am talking about bad phases. What happens when a person faces problems, problems and problems day by day. One problem followed by another problem and then yet another. It seems endless and it may eat up days, months, years or even decades also.Fatigue of these problems start to take a toll on the person after a period of time. He may get crumbled. He may get overpowered too. That person start to question the authenticity of right and wrong. He begins to find shortcuts. Somehow he wants to end this situation to continue forever. As the darkness means an unknown path, these shortcuts do not have definite fate. Even if they succeed somehow to take course of shortcuts, how long they are going to survive in a marathon of life is any body’s guess only. You may say that may be after a period of time, if they happen to find a right path, they may again survive. But as I said, the result is unknown. This kind of uneasiness creates frustration and may lead to many questions. One of the most frequently asked is – when will it end. You know what – I have seen a pattern in that and that’s what I am going to discuss here.

This phase is analogous to the tunnel of darkness. When you are inside a tunnel of darkness you will not be able to see even your both hands. You don’t know where this tunnel will lead to as you don’t know the path. The path is unknown. And guess what – unknown means – something which is not known. Even in your hidden sense you don’t know what it is. So the bad phase can be considered as a tunnel of darkness. Bad phase cannot be defined in terms of time for a person. It varies from individual to individual. You might have seen in your practical experience that for some people the bad phase may continue for years, say for 10 years or who knows for entire life also. Sometimes it’s for a month or so and sometimes for an year. But the whole point is – nobody knows how long it’s going to continue. It’s like a stock market where nobody is sure when a bull/bear run is going to end. Everybody can predict but nobody knows for sure. That’s a big trouble you know. What should I do in this case as an individual, is a big question mark which many of the times people pose and they may not find an answer.

Now let’s take an instance. A person is inside this tunnel. He is frustrated as he doesn’t know where to go but is not hopeless. He tries to find a way. He plans his moves and see if this way of that way lead to the exit of tunnel somehow. Nobody knows if he’ll ever succeed. But irrespective of the result, he keeps on trying, trying and trying. Some day his continuous efforts bear the fruit and he’s able to find the end-point/exit of the tunnel. You may say – so what nobody’s sure if he’ll ever succeed. That’s true, nobody knows. But irrespective of any results he’s busy in making efforts. Result is the fruit of long term continuous efforts and he keeps on doing just that on day to day basis. If you look around, you will find success is just the name of sustained efforts even in the dark phase irrespective of result.

Let’s take another scenario. Another person who is stuck in the tunnel somehow gets hopeless, utterly frustrated and demotivated because he doesn’t know the end of it. He resigns and leave it at the hand of fate and time. Sometimes, time come for the rescue and he finds the exit in a rare case but most of times he dies. In terms of dark phase, he is swallowed by it. He begins to take illegitimate actions which may not be fruitful for him in long term. With experience I have seen that people who puts their efforts continuously without thinking end result succeed in finding exit point and they become successful in the long run also. Bad phase provides opportunity of sort for people. We begin to understand the value of good people at that time. You also begin to find out real jewels in the crowd of so many fake stones. You begin to appreciate tiny amount of pleasures of your life.

So my learning about dark phase is – one should not lose heart just because she/he can’s see the exit point. One has to keep going and make sustained effort. It’s like stock market yet again where people who are busy in short-term gains become the victims of volatile nature of the market. People who concentrate on the basics of a stock and don’t get carried away with rumours and short-term loss/gain taste success in the long run.

In indian society, most of the times, we are worried what others think about us. What he/she will say if I do something. Or what will be the reaction of family/friends etc. In this process we tend to forget what we really want from ourselves. But in my view this is a very important point. You want to do something which might make other person happy. If you are clear in your conscience with whatever you are doing, other people really dont come in the picture. Do whatever good your heart says to do.

Most of times we dont listen to our soft feelings which our heart asks us to do. Mind overpowers our feelings, dont you think. You will think that I can help this/that guy but your mind will start thinking that …hey this guy didnt help me that time or…what will I get in return if I help him…Your heart says that you should help him but mind plays game. In process those soft feelings are lost somewhere.